WWW Blog: Blitzø vs Movie Deadpool

WWW BLOG: BLITZØ VS DEADPOOL

(HELLUVA BOSS VS FOX/MCU)

“Humor was a good way to hide the pain” - Rick Riordan

4th TN was by CypherUltraKingSonic

LET’S BEGIN

BLITZØ, Boss of I.M.P

DEADPOOL, The Merc with a Mouth

Let’s be brutally honest, life can suck! Whether it’s having a garbage father, losing everything you love, and everybody treating you like shit, these are situations that people sadly have gone through. While normal people cope with therapy or alcohol, these two red jokesters cope by killing people for money! Probably not the best way to cope but it all turned out great for them at the end thanks to their found families!

However, what if both of them got a hit on each other? Will Blitzø be able to return to Hell with his most accomplished kill yet, or will Deadpool make Blitzø say “Bye Bye Bye!” Let’s answer…

WHO WOULD WIN?!

WHAT WILL WE USE?!

Thankfully unlike last time, it is clear on what is considered canon for both characters.

For Blitzø, he will be receiving: Helluva Boss, Hazbin Hotel, Helluva Shorts, the short Hazbin Hotel comic run, the upcoming Helluva Boss Board Game, and all music videos.

For Deadpool, he will be receiving: The MCU, The FOX Universes, and Sony’s Live Action Films, along with the games and comics that tie in said backgrounds.

Also I guess commercials and videos from the Brandon Rogers and Ryan Reynolds channel could be added for fun, doesn’t add a whole lot besides some laughs while researching.

ALSO HUGE CONTENT WARNING!!!

If you are uncomfortable with mild gore, sex, blood, swearing, unicorns, and other adult topics, why are you reading a Hellaverse and Deadpool Blog?

Also massive shout outs to the MCU Wiki, Hellaverse Wiki, and all the people who made the Calcs in some of the links!

Now that is all established, let’s begin!

BACKGROUND

BLITZØ

“All right, so we all know how things go right? Humans on Earth do some pretty fucked-up shit, and then they die and they end up in Hell. And sinners all have an idea of what Imps are, right? We're little red guys with pitchforks, torturing their souls for all eternity. Well... *chuckles* that's fucking outdated. Most of us are baristas and boring shit, and since we're born here, we kind of get to serve whoever the fuck lands in our backyard. But some of us aim to be a little something more. A little something bigger, something cooler, something… yeah, cooler. So instead of selling 'em coffee, we're gonna sell 'em... REVENGE!”

• Full Name: Blitzø Buckzo

• Age: 36

• Height: 4’ 9, under 6’ 0 with horns

• Boss of I.M.P

• Former Circus Performer

• Likes: Horses, Sex, Killing, Taylor Swift

• Dislikes: Himself, His Past

• Failed to kill Grandpa

Once upon a time, there was a glowing city protected by golden gates known as Heaven. It was ruled by beings of pure light, Angels that worshiped good and shielded all from evil. Then some guy named Lucifer was a troublemaker, blah blah blah, he fell in love with another rebel named Eve, yak yak yak, they shared free will to humanity and accidentally created Hell and thus disrupted order, and finally the two love birds were banished to Hell as punishment. Yadda yadda, you know this, what they don’t tell you is that Sinners aren’t the only ones down in Hell! When Hell was created, Hellborns began to take life. Hellborn vary in terms of species, some are the powerful royals known as the Ars Goetia, then there are others like the Succubi, Possessors, Baphomets, Infestors, and other tons of variety! However, the lowest class (besides Hellhounds I suppose) are Imps! Imps are looked down upon due to their short stature and usual lack of physical might. However, some Imps strive for greater things, to make their mark in Hell, and one of these Imps was named Blitzø! The O is silent!

Blitzø was born into a circus with a Mother and Sister who loved him… and a Father willing to sell him for $5 and a condom. Ah well, at least he had his best friend Fizzarolli, who upstaged him in every single circus performance! Ok, maybe his childhood wasn’t all peaches and cream. Despite this, he was selected as the new best friend to the Ars Goetia’s next prince, that prince was named Stolas. Stolas developed a crush on Blitzø after being charmed by his circus performance and requested to be friends with Blitzø, but of course Blitzø’s Father ruined the blossoming friends to lovers as he used his son to rob them. Blitzø’s life would remain shitty as his Father would always use him for his own gain and make sure that his admiration would always direct towards Fizz. This would leave Blitzø in an emotionally vulnerable state as he would accidentally knock over a flaming cake that caused a chain reaction that sent the circus on fire! The fire scared Blitzø and Fizz and killed Blitzø’s mother, leaving him alone.

Blitzø would try to reconnect with his former loved ones but Blitzø’s Father made sure to block off everyone's connections to Blitzø in order to sour Blitzø’s relationship with what’s left of his family thus making them hate him. Blitzø made an attempt to forge new relationships by becoming a clown, going to college (eventually dropping out), and being bodyguards to pop stars, but it always ended up in either a breakup or the other side hating him.

Eventually, Blitzø realized that if he wanted to rise up in Hell, he’d have to do something unique. There were lots of assassins in Hell, but there are only 7 rings in hell and all of them of so many competitions, how could Blitzø rise with those odds against him? So what if hypothetically, Blitzø decided to target a different realm, EARTH! It’s perfect, Sinners are naturally spiteful and twisted so they could just hire Blitzø to kill their enemies! A perfect business for Hell! 

But Blitzø couldn’t do that on his own, he needed employees! So he went to the pound to adopt a strong Hellhound, he needed some muscle after all. However, he noticed the 17 year old Hound named Loona who was struggling with the fact that she was going to be put down because nobody gave her a chance, Blitzø emphasized with her so to her surprise she was happily adopted. Later down the line Blitzø got arrested (likely not the first time) and during his escape plan he met the Mafia’s ex member Moxxie. They worked together and Blitzø hired him afterwards. Finally, an assassin named Millie stole a hit from Blitzø so Blitzø confronted Millie, not to kill her for “revenge” but to recruit her as he saw potential in her. While she was initially antagonistic, she quickly was charmed by Blitzø’s “weirdness” so she joined and soon fell in love with Moxxie, much to Blitzø’s confusion. With enough members, Blitzø formed I.M.P (Immediate Murder Professionals) and even bought an office for them.

I.M.P had everything they needed to get started… except for an actual way to travel to the human realm. So Blitzø decided to steal from one of the most powerful beings of Hell, what could go wrong? Blitzø would try to steal a Grimoire from the Ars Goetia when he was confronted by his old pal Stolas, now all grown up and in an abusive relationship with the idiotic Stella. Stolas initially flirted with Blitzø jokingly, but this inspired Blitzø into coming up with the plan to “seduce” Stolas into giving him the Grimoire. This worked a little too well so Blitzø and Stolas made the deal to “make love” every full moon in exchange for Blitzø keeping the Grimoire.

So, with those issues gone, I.M.P was able to travel to the human realm and start their business. While they did go through the occasional issue once in a while (Petty Exes, Mafia, Heaven’s Cherubs, rival Assassins, etc.) they always came out on top! The only thing that was dragging themselves down was themselves. As much as Blitzø used comedy and sex jokes to distract himself and others, deep down he was still a mess who was convinced he would die alone. Stolas actually made an attempt to get to know Blitzø better and enter a serious relationship, but due to the fact that he treated Blitzø as a “plaything”, Blitzø didn’t believe in him.

After that uncomfortable encounter, Blitzø would make an attempt to make amends for some of his mistakes. While he got nowhere with his Sister, Fizz and some of his exes managed to forgive him! He also strengthened his bond with I.M.P, solidifying them as not only his coworkers, but his family! 

However, unknown to him, his relationship with Stolas wasn’t kept as secret as he would like, the arrogant Goetia Andrealphus took notice and used this information to plot a scheme for power. He’d make a trial and sentence Blitzø to death, knowing Stolas would stop it and take the blame. Stolas then was stripped of his power by Satan and banished from seeing his daughter. I.M.P shortly after entered battle with Andrealphus to try and let Stolas get his life back but despite beating him thanks to Stolas’ daughter, the daughter didn’t forgive Stolas for all the lying he had done and distanced herself from him.

Now we leave Blitzø and I.M.P in an uncertain state. Danger is creeping all around them, will they die, will Stolas be able to get his life back, will they stop Andrealphus? Only time will tell, but know this, Blitzø has been through hell all his life, figuratively and literally, but now with his life being the best it has been in a while, he’ll give you hell if you try to take it away from him again!

DEADPOOL

“Wha- Oh! Oh, hello. I know, right? Who’s balls did I have to fondle to get my very own movie? I can’t tell you, but it does rhyme with Pullverine. And let me tell you; he’s got a nice pair of smooth criminals down under. Anyway, I got places to be, a face to fix, and - oh! Bad guys to kill.”

• Real Name: Wade Wilson

• Age: 47

• Height: 6’ 2

• Marvel Jesus

• Former X-Men Trainee

• Likes: Unicorns, Dubstep, Dogpool, Giggiting Lois

• Dislikes: Green Lantern, Lazy Writing, Gen Z

• Designer of the Wolverine Popcorn Bucket

The MCU! Such a fantastic universe with rich history and potential at getting milked. This cinematic universe has changed film history and has made B-List heroes into the real stars of Marvel. All of this… isn’t what FOX was doing, besides the milking. All those confusing timelines and inconsistent quality gets to a point of tirement, and the fact that they were somewhat ashamed of being a comic book movie with the black suits. Luckily, there is a savior, his name was LOGAN! But that’s not the guy we’re talking about, so let’s talk about the other silver lining, the R-Rated Mercenary himself, DEADPOOL!

NOT THAT ONE!

There we go!

Before he became the Merc with a Mouth, he originally went exclusively with the name Wade Wilson. Wade’s life was pretty rough ever since he was a child, his Dad left him before he was even born, he was raised in a household where his large family barely loved each other, and Scoutmaster Kevin. This left Wade in a very cruddy life, eventually when he turned 18 he decided to enter the Canadian Special Operations Forces since he had nothing else to do. Wade was actually an accomplished soldier, having over 40 kills! Eventually, Wade decided to use his new skills to become an assassin, killing people for money. He believed he was a “Bad Guy” and was far too gone, wanting to kill worse people than himself. Deep down however, Wade was ultimately still a good person as he always stuck out his neck for people, mainly children.

Thankfully, Wade’s life eventually turned around when he met the prostitute Vanessa in an assassin bar. They hung out due to mutual attraction and decided to have intercourse with each other, and then do it again, and again, and again, and you get the point. The more time they spent with each other, the more they fell in love with each other as they matched each other's crazy. Wade soon got the courage to propose to Vanessa, she happily accepted, and then Wade found out he had Cancer! Quite the shift of events isn’t it?

The Doctors told Wade that his condition was fatal and that there wasn’t much they could do. This put Wade into a depression, unlike for the last 30+ years of his life he had something to lose now, his fiancee! Wade was desperate to find a cure and fate had a unique answer. He was approached by a man named The Recruiter (although Deadpool calls him Agent Smith) who was impressed with Wade’s background of successful kills, viewing him as the perfect soldier. He offered to help cure Wade’s Cancer and turn him into a Superhero. Wade rejected at first but after realizing he doesn’t have many other options and wanting to see Vannesa again, he met up with The Recruiter to ultimately go through with his offer. The Recruiter took Wade to meet a man named Ajax Francis (Weird, I didn't cross out Ajax and put Francis there?)!

Turns out, Wade was tricked as he wasn’t there to become a Superhero, he was there to become a SuperSLAVE! There Francis injected a serum that artificially gave him an X-gene, but in order to activate it, Wade would need to be in a situation where it would save him. So Francis tortured Wade in order to activate it, eventually it did work but it came at a cost, Wade became horribly disfigured from the process along with his Cancer being mixed in. While the whole process did stop Deadpool’s Cancer and gave him superhuman physique and Regeneration, it also turned him into a “monster” as he’d put it, convinced that Vanessa wouldn’t go back to him. Enraged, Wade made an escape plan and fought Francis to the death. Sadly, Francis did end up winning and left Wade to die in the fire he caused…

Is what I would say if his process into turning Wade into a near unkillable man!

Believing he couldn’t go back to Vanessa in his current condition, Wade decided to hunt down Francis in order to find a cure. With the knowledge that Francis believes he’s dead, Wade decided to use this to his advantage and thus created an alter ego named Captain Deadpool! But Deadpool rolls off the tongue better so he went with that instead. Deadpool went on to hunt down all of Francis’ men and accidentally caused a bit of destruction to the public which caught the eye of Colossus. Colossus stopped Deadpool from continuing further, just when he had his hands on Francis, and Deadpool was forced to retreat. Now knowing Wade was alive, Francis hunted down Vanessa and kidnapped her so that Wade would come to confront him. Once Deadpool learned about this, he reluctantly teamed up with Colossus and his student Negasonic Teenage Warhead (yes that’s her name) to square off against Francis!

After a very epic battle, Deadpool finally defeated Francis thanks to his new friends and he tried to get Francis to spill the beans on a cure, but unfortunately for him there was none. Deadpool was the better man between the two so he sp- yeah of course he killed him. At least Vanessa accepted Wade for who he was despite his disfiguration and they lived happily ever after, until assassins came by and killed her. Man, Wade can’t catch a break can he?

With no more reason to keep living, Deadpool tried to kill himself multiple times but Francis made it very hard for him to actually die. So Deadpool decided to take Colossus’ offer for him to join the X-Men (or at least become a Trainee) and help people. His first mission was to stop a rampaging kid named Russell (also known as Firefist) from destroying the Essex House for Mutant Rehabilitation! Deadpool managed to actually stop Russell but after finding out the abuse he went through in there and finding out that the Headmaster was evil, Deadpool tried to kill them but was forcibly arrested and got removed of his powers thanks to a Mutant Inhibitor Collar.

Deadpool decided that he would rot in prison since he would inevitably die from Cancer in the jail and he had no reason to live, he pushed everyone away including Russell. Suddenly, a future time traveler named Cable arrived and started a rampage trying to kill Russell since he would kill his family in the future. Deadpool fought Cable and managed to break his Mutant Inhibitor Collar. Knowing that Cable would hunt Russell down, Deadpool created the team X-Force (who all but one died very quickly) and fought Cable which accidentally led to Russell freeing the Juggernaut and storming back to the Essex House for Mutant Rehabilitation! Deadpool and Cable teamed up and the X-Men showed up to help Deadpool take down Juggernaut. Cable then tried to kill Russell but Deadpool sacrificed himself to save Russell which saved the future. Knowing the good man Wade was deep down, Cable went back in time to save him which left Deadpool with a Time Watch. After Negasonic fixed it, Deadpool went back in time and saved Vanessa.

But that whole experience made Wade realize that he felt like he didn’t matter, he tried to join the Avengers but they rejected him. This led Wade to a mid-life crisis and caused a wedge between him and Vanessa, breaking up in the process. This would’ve been the end of Wade’s story if the TVA didn’t show up! The TVA wanted to recruit Deadpool which he happily accepted! Until he found out that his universe was dying because Logan died, and Logan was the “Anchor Being.” One of the workers at the TVA named Mr. Paradox wanted to destroy Deadpool’s universe to “get it over with” so Deadpool fled the scene and started looking for a Wolverine to replace him.

After going through an entire montage, Deadpool finally found a Wolverine to replace him with, unfortunately he got “the worst one” as he was a previous mass murderer after the murder of his friends and the TVA sent both Regenerating “heroes” to the Void. Deadpool and Wolverine fought each other but after getting it out of their systems they made a truce… which fell apart due to Logan’s trauma and anger getting in the way. It wasn’t until Logan met X-23 (Logan’s daughter in Deadpool’s timeline) and after he had a talk with her he realized that it wasn’t too late for him, helped by the fact that he saw how many people Wade cared about deep down and wanted to save. So both Deadpool and Wolverine finally had their big team up after many years of waiting in real life and they ended up stopping Mr. Paradox’s Time Ripper from destroying all of reality. Logan became the new anchor being and Wade offered him to stay at his place, to become a part of his family.

Finally, after all these years, Wade finally got the happy ending. He got a team up with Logan, built himself a family, and even got back together with Vanessa thanks to Logan. Wade thought he was a bad guy but after seeing all the people who surrounded him at his table, perhaps he wasn’t as bad as he thought he was. While Doomsday may approach the Marvel Multiverse, Deadpool will prove that he has earned the title of Superhero!

ABILITIES

BLITZØ

IMP PHYSIOLOGY

While Imps generally lack the magical potential and physical might of Sinners, they still have some useful abilities attached to themselves.

Imps are often compared physically to opossums and the comparison isn’t without merit. Their bodies are slim and nimble, allowing themselves to quickly escape situations and have high agility potential. Their slim bodies also help enhance their stealth skills and fit into vents and other tight spaces. Imps bodies are also very resilient to pain, able to take minor gunshots, recover from broken bones, and being able to twist their neck fully without death or injury. They also have built in immune systems strong enough to take in deadly human diseases as minor colds (comes from a livestream and while the information is dubiously canon, eh nothing is contradicting this one so I’ll count it, doesn’t affect the verdict lol).

Imps bodies also have good abilities with specific parts. Their eyes are equipped with night vision and can glow in the dark.

As you’ve most likely noticed, Imps bodies are incredibly sharp. Their teeth are perfect for biting in case they are removed from their weapons. Their talons are perfect for digging in their opponents skin and allows them to climb on solid surfaces such as wood and metal. Their tongues can stretch and grab onto small objects. Their horns and back spikes… don’t do much, but they do look cool!

Finally we have the most versatile part of the Imps bodies, their tail! It is shockingly strong as it’s able to pull Blitzø’s own weight. It’s also able to stretch to absurd lengths, able to go from the top of the tree and the bottom with little issue. This elasticity allows Blitzø to use his tail as a lasso to grapple his foes to either pull them closer for melee attacks or to toss them as seen above. The tails are also sharp so stabbing should be game.

Finally, Imps are immune to fire, likely because they are in hell. However, they aren’t immune to hell fire, but I don’t think Deadpool has that so Blitzø shouldn’t worry about it too much.

ACROBATICS

Blitzø grew up in the circus and around Fizzarolli, so he’d naturally be very agile. While he isn’t as skilled in the art of Trapeze as Fizz, he still has shown many times to have used his slim body to dart around the area and perform impressive acrobatic feats as seen here. 

MINOR REGENERATION

Blitzø has gotten black eyes, bullet wounds, and minor scars and has managed to heal them anywhere from a couple of hours to even a minute.

TELEPORTATION

How else do you explain this? Like, a lot of characters in this series just do this with no explanation.

4TH WALL BREAKING

They know your search history.

IMP-TERRUPTION’S

What the hell are these things? Well they come from the official Helluva Boss Board Game of course! Yep, that is going to exist as the game is currently in development, however we do know the core mechanics and most of the cards so it is viable at the moment. The problem is that most of the cards aren’t really viable for a situation like this. The context of the game is that I.M.P are competing on who can take out the most people as they tamper with each other's portals as they switch out the targets for less valuable ones to screw with each other. While this is fine and dandy, it’s pretty hard to fit in a combat scenario like this since the entire point is if Blitzø can kill Deadpool or not, switching out a different target kinda defeats the purpose here. Luckily, there are a couple cards called IMP-Turruption’s that could possibly be used.

	“When an opponent plays a Spell or IMP-terruption, copy its effect for yourself.” This would basically be the move Copycat from Pokemon, allowing Blitzø to copy a specific spell or power used.
	“Stop a Target on The Portal from being moved or claimed.” Basically, this stops any manipulation done to Blitzø’s portals (oops, spoilers).
	“Cancel the last Spell or IMP-Terruption Card played.” Ignoring the minor spelling error I had to fix here, this is basically the opposite to “I Taught ‘em That” as it instead cancels a spell or power being used.
	“Swaps a Summon card with any other card on The Portal.” This is basically a failsafe for…
	Finally we have the only non IMP-turruption card here because it is actually a detriment to Blitzø! If Blitzø gets 5 Summon cards, he goes straight back to hell and is unable to return for a while, basically a lose-con.

DEADPOOL

REGENERATION

One of the three things Deadpool is most well known for is his Regeneration! Deadpool is able to Regenerate from bullet wounds in mere seconds and has recovered from getting mauled by Polar Bears, and getting stabbed through the head. Deadpool can also Regenerate severed limbs, being ripped in half, and even when his entire body is blown apart into pieces, although it can take a while to get back to prime shape. Luckily for Deadpool, he has some extra tricks up his sleeve…

EXTREME PAIN TOLERANCE

While Deadpool’s Regeneration isn’t perfect, his pain tolerance helps him stay standing. His pain tolerance is strong enough that Deadpool can get up with little pain after getting rained down by several bullets. Even when he is in brief pain, it is very short as he’s usually ready to throw hands again the next second. Even without his powers, Deadpool’s Pain Tolerance is enough that he doesn’t react much to getting stabbed and managed to stay alive for a while when dying.

ENHANCED SENSES

Regeneration isn’t the only power Deadpool has, his physical features have been enhanced and peak human condition, or at least what Marvel considers “human level.” Deadpool’s senses are one of these physical features as he can see pretty far and his hearing is good enough that he can tell if someone got up behind him or if someone is preparing a sneak attack.

ACROBATICS

Deadpool is also pretty acrobatic, he constantly does flips and martial arts that make use of his great agility.

4TH WALL BREAKING

The second thing Deadpool is known for is his 4th Wall Breaks! Deadpool is aware that he is in a movie and is usually aware of a specific scene he’s in or if he’s in a flashback. Now unlike what most people think, he isn’t a grand cosmic reality warper, he’s still trapped in the confines of the narrative. Deadpool’s just simply aware of the 4th Wall and cracks jokes to the audience.

Anyway, I assume he’s here to break the 4th RIGHT NOW!

Sup.

The hell are you still doing here Sonic? That bit was like several Blogs ago.

I just realized I forgot something, you’re still doing these in 2026?

Oh shut up.

ARSENAL

BLITZØ

GOLDEN PERCUSSION PISTOL

Blitzø’s personal go to weapon is this pistol. While it may look small it is very powerful as it can blow shit up as if it was a grenade launcher. It also can shoot fairly far unlike most pistols.

SNIPER RIFLE

While Blitzø likes to go in guns blazing at times, he can also use his stealth skills with the Sniper Rifle and precisely kill people from long distances.

EMERGEN-C BAG

This is where Blitzø keeps the rest of his arsenal in, with some of these weapons I’d assume it has the power of hammerspace.

SHOTGUN

Shotguns are often used in close combat, and hill billies. They are quite powerful but do lack range and speed when compared to their brothers.

SUBMACHINE GUN

Submachine guns are also meant for close combat but they are the opposite of Shotguns, they lack power but they have pretty good range and speed.

DUAL PISTOLS

While Pistols don't have the strongest or fastest shots, they can come in handy when in a pinch.

KNIFE

Blitzø isn’t a stranger to getting close and personal, also that in a fight! Look how happy he is in this photo!

AXE

BEHOLD! THE AXE-INATOR!

SPIKED BASEBALL BAT

As fun as this would be to use, the guy that he hit didn’t bleed or die! That’s assuming his brain damage doesn’t kill him though. Although he does use this to “fore” with…

GRENADE

I shouldn’t have to explain what grenades do at this point, do I? Honestly just play Call of Duty to figure out what 50% of his arsenal does.

DYNAMITE

Want to blow shit up? Well a couple sticks of dynamite can do the job excellently, although if you want something bigger…

MY D***

Yes that’s what the Rocket Launches is called, did you expect anything else. Speaking of “did you expect anything else”, it’s a giant Rocket Launcher, guess what it does?

DISGUISES

Blitzø can’t read the Grimoire to its fullest extent so he can’t use the disguises to blend in, thus he uses “the dupe” in order to trick people. Either that or people are just stupid, either or works.

ROPE

They weren’t kidding in the Jingle when they said they’d make kills look like suicide.

BETHANY’S GHOST GHOST SUCKER 9000

This is just a regular vacuum, Ghosts don’t exist in the Hellaverse so I’m pretty sure it doesn’t do anything that a regular vacuum couldn’t do.

“FUN” TOYS

I’ll save the details since I want this Blog to not get banned lol. Nothing here that would seriously harm Deadpool, I’l say that much (if anything he’d like it).

POPCORN

WAIT, how and where did he get popcorn? He and Fizzarolli were trapped in a cage in this scene, does he just have popcorn in his pocket at all times?

GRIMOIRE

This was how Blitzø originally managed to portal his way from Hell into Earth. The Grimoire is a powerful book with the abilities of… actually Blitzø doesn’t know how to read or spell very well so it isn’t very useful here, he could bash Deadpool’s head in I suppose.

OTHER IMP EQUIPMENT

Being the boss and owning the company, Blitzø should have access to all the equipment M+M used, even if he's never used them onscreen.

• Crossbow: Used for long ranged combat and it is much easier to use than a regular bow.

• Antioxidants+Ibuprofen+Morphine: Ok, not everything IMP owns are weapons lol. Although Morphine could be useful to block out pain, even if it doesn’t remove it.

• Baseball Bat: It’s like the Spiked Baseball Bat, just without a point (hehe, get it! Cause you know, the Spiked Baseball Bat has sharp points while the reg-).

• Bow: It is harder to aim but it does shoot faster than a Crossbow.

• Tommy Gun: It fires in rapid bursts, making it perfect for close encounters.

• Revolvers: They come in silver, bright gold, dark gold, and black with a hint of red. Fancy!

• Chainsaws: Chainsaws are actually not very effective weapons, they take a moment to activate and a smart opponent can exploit the design flaws and rip it apart. It is perfect for slow and painful execution however!

• Katanas: These swords are perfect for quick and powerful slashes, though they require both hands to be used effectively.

• SMG: SMG’s fire extremely rapidly, but they aren’t as strong as other rapid fire weapons. They are good weapons for an ambush to get in quick hits with.

• Beartrap: Remember Little Mac vs NES Jason? Come one read it, I put a lot of effort into it!

• Long Axe: Unlike the axe Blitzø is seen using, these Axes are far more powerful and can grapple, at the cost of less parrying potential.

• Energy Rifle: This weapon doesn’t exist in real life, but Loona used this to blast a bunch or Dhorks members apart. It fires rapidly and it is very powerful, why doesn’t IMP use this more often?

• Throwing Stars: These weapons aren’t too effective to kill with, however they can take out certain parts of the body and are perfect for a distraction to pull out a deadlier weapon.

• Longsword: Similar to the long axe, it trades speed and parrying for raw power and grappling.

• Nunchucks: These weapons (that got banned in the 87 TMNT cartoon for some strange reason) are useful for rapid strikes and using their unique structure to disarm and squeeze their opponents.

• Dagger: These are like Throwing Stars as they aren’t too effective in killing. However, they are a good last resort and are perfect for a final surprise attack.

• Gasoline and Matches: Considering the immunity to fire that Imps possess, imagine the destructive potential this can do!

• Gatiling Gun: A devastating force meant to break apart groups.

• Spear: Meant for long ranged combat with a melee weapon.

GOETIA WEAPONRY

For some reason, the Ars Goetia have weapons? Regardless of logic, IMP stole some of the weapons and used them against Andrealphus.

• Sword: Blitzø used this to cut off Andrealphus’ ice monster's neck, oh dear.

• AK-47: Probably has some angelic bullets inside, or maybe not but it still should be as strong as the other weapons.

• Shovel: A certain knight would be proud.

• Axe: They didn’t use everything lol.

• Rocket Launcher: As if Blitzø needs more! I wonder what lude name he’d give it?

• Lance: Blitzø used this to lock Andrealphus’ monster’s jaw open.

CARMINE-CRAFTED BLESSING-TIPPED RIFLE (DEBATABLE)

It is extremely debatable if this should be counted, but since I.M.P did technically confiscate it, it will be mentioned just in case. This Rifle holds angelic bullets which have the unique ability to slow down and even stop magical abilities, including regeneration and bypass immortality.

ASMODEUS CRYSTAL

Wanting to stop their toxic relationship, Stolas gifted Blitzø an Asmodeus Crystal so that he could travel to the human world without needing the Grimoire. Blitzø can use this to portal to any part of the earth he desires. While he struggled to use it at first, he has since mastered it and has used it to appear in very hyper specific locations. However, the portals can’t stay forever and are vulnerable to spells and sabotage.

DEADPOOL

TVA SUIT

Once Deadpool joined the TVA he was given a brand new suit! It gives him metal brass gloves, a utility belt to hold his guns, and increased durability.

KATANAS

And this is probably the last of the three things people know about Deadpool, his iconic Katanas of course! He’s quite proficient with these when he’s out of ammon, slicing and dicing people. He’s skilled enough with them that he can twist Juggernaut’s helmet, parry Wolverine blow for blow and stab through his skin, knowing where his skeleton is and avoiding it.

ADAMANTIUM KATANAS (AND KNIVES)

When the TVA gave him the suit, they also upgraded his Katanas and knives by giving them a pair made out of the extremely durable metal known as Adamantium. This basically makes breaking them impossible and allows Deadpool to hurt opponents way out of his league.

KNIFE

Well it ain’t Barney the Purple Dinosaur! Or made of Adamantium…

BABY KNIFE

Deadpool’s last resort in a fight, probably his favorite weapon as he always announces it first, he should give a proper name to it tbh.

IMI DESSERT EAGLES

Deadpool’s primary choice of combat when he’s at a distance. These guns are actually impractical in real life when compared to other pieces of his arsenal as it has limited rounds. Deadpool does make great use of his limited ammo though, so it’s more of a skill flex.

GOLD PLATED 50 CALIBER DESERT EAGLE PISTOL ARROWS

“Are those Gold Plated 50 Caliber Desert Eagle Pistol Arrows?” They also have an absurd amount of ammo for some reason in that fight scene?

COLT MODEL 1908 VEST POCKET

Deadpool stole this from Blind Al and was the only gun he remembered to bring when fighting Francis, luckily this gun got the honor of killing him.

PARA-ORDNANCE P14.45 LIMITED

Also a pretty simple and fairly weak gun but at least Deadpool doesn’t go around in action packed fights with this, only to threaten stalkers with pizza.

WATER GUN

Sometimes the most unexpected option will be the most deadly option… or maybe not.

HELLO KITTY DUFFLE BAG

A good place for storing all of Deadpool’s guns and other items when he needs to bring them all. Of course he forgot them all but that’s besides the point. Also Fun Fact: Deadpool was supposed to use these guns in the movie, but the movie was running out of budget so they cut the scene and turned this concept into a joke, actually A+ writing.

THE GUNS IN SAID DUFFLE BAG

Uh here’s the shit Deadpool put in that would actually be useful in a fight…

• Glock 17: Not the Glock 19 :(

• Heckler & Koch Mark 23: Now this gun is generally the recommended handgun for war purposes, able to fire several rounds without a barrel charge.

• Smith & Wesson Model 29: While it may look small, it’s actually quite powerful, I’m gonna struggle putting explanations for each of these guns aren’t I?

• Heckler & Koch UMP45: This is actually a very powerful gun with a controllable fire rate and high modularity. Why has Deadpool never used this?

• IMI Mini Uzi: UZI! LIKE UZI DOORMAN FROM MURDER DR-

• Norcino Type 845-2: This is a variation of an AK-47, just put everything you could say for an AK-47 here, I’m lazy.

• Steyr AUG A1: This gun's strengths are its Integrated Optics and Backup Sights.

• Shotgun: Didn’t I talk about this in Blitzø’s Weapons section? I’m surprised I haven’t seen overlap between the two in Weapons until now.

OTHER WEAPONS HE OWNS

These are weapons that Deadpool has never used onscreen (well neither the ones in the Duffle Bag but shut up) but we do know he has access to…

• Vickers Mk1: This is a heavy machine gun with high firepower and a high rapid fire, it is hard to transport and it is a standing one meaning it is more of a situational environmental weapon, Blitzø will have to be careful if he doesn’t want it to rain gunfire.

• Lewis Gun: While this may not look like it, the Lewis Gun is a very powerful machine gun famous for its usage in aircrafts.

• RPG-7: This is a fucking rocket launcher, Deadpool doesn’t use this because otherwise the movies would’ve ended way sooner, at least that’s what I think because why wouldn’t he use this more often?

• Shovel: Huh, never thought there could be Shovel vs Shovel dynamic with this fight but here we are.

• Toupee: No, it’s a hairsystem.

PARACHUTE

FORTNITE!

ADVENTURE TIME WATCH

What time is it? Might be Adventure Time, or time to kill that dickhead Francis. Either way Deadpool has excellent taste.

MUSIC BOX

As funny as this joke is, who the hell sold this thing? That’s like making an entire music box about 9/11 a month afterward (or at all). I mean I guess Wade could’ve made it but I don’t know if he would have the time and dedication for that while he was going through his depressive per- I went on another tangent again didn’t I?

PROFESSOR X’S WHEELCHAIR

Truly an important piece of Deadpool’s arsenal that will shift the verdict if added or removed.

CABLE’S TIME TRAVEL WATCH (DEBATABLE)

Ok, now we’re getting into the equipment that you might question Deadpool getting standard access too, but since we gave some non standard access equipment to Blitzø, it only seems fair. This is a time travel watch that allows Deadpool to travel throughout time and space. This will be mentioned on its effectiveness in the Verdict (Spoiler: Its usefulness rhymes with gun).

MUTANT INHIBITOR COLLAR

This turns off all powers that come from Mutant Genes. Won’t do anything to Blitzø but it would turn off Deadpool’s Regeneration! Ignore how bad of an idea that is.

TEMPAD

After Deadpool found out his universe was being planned to get the Old Yeller treatment, he stole this from the TVA to travel across different dimensions to find different Wolverines to replace his dead one. I just explained what it does so uh… lit.

WOLVERINE’S SKELETON

Deadpool used Wolverine’s skeleton to fight the Minutemen in Marvel's best opening sequence of all time!

VEHICLES

BLITZØ

I.M.P VAN

This may be a regular van, no really there isn’t much it does that a regular one can’t do. I guess you could have a cool car chase with it perhaps.

HELICOPTER

Hell yeah! Helicopters are very useful, they can fly and… oh they crashed it, darn (Also don’t question why Moxxie is wearing a dress).

DEADPOOL

ZAMBONI

With this Deadpool can easily kill Blitzø… in 5 minutes of him laying on the ground still.

SCOOTER

I mean it doesn’t do much more than what you’d expect with a regular Scooter.

SANTA’S SLEIGH

Deadpool can fly! Unless the reindeer are shot down but hey, he can at least scale to the Santa feat now!

SUPPORT

BLITZØ

EELS

Oh dear, looks like Deadpool is as good as dead now! In fairness, while Blitzø did buy these with the intention of pets, they did set his office ablaze with their electricity.

DEADPOOL

DOGPOOL

God’s greatest gift, sadly she’ll be removed from the debate because we don’t need Deadpool “Beyond The Concept of Difficulty” diffing Blitzø.

MENTALITY

BLITZØ

While Blitzø is unable to read, is a college dropout, and does lack common sense, to call him a complete idiot would be denying his moments of intelligence.

Blitzø has pretty good stealth skills and came up with the plan to seduce Stolas in order to get his book. He also is very charismatic, often able to manipulate and sway others into believing him. He also has shown pretty good street smarts and is able to create elaborate escape plans on a couple of occasions. His driving skills are also pretty good (albeit reckless) and he was able to tell what type of person someone is by their driving habits.

But the best indicator of Blitzø’s talents is obviously in combat. We know Blitzø has been fighting for at least 5 years since he has been doing assassin work for as long as he had Loona (Loona is currently 22 and he adopted her at 17) and likely longer considering his previous bodyguard work. Blitzø tends to go in guns blazing but is overall the most well rounded of his teammates. He’s skilled enough to defeat Striker, someone who gave Millie and Moxxie serious trouble and they are professional close and far range killers. Blitzø is pretty good at sniping, is very adaptable to the situation, has complete mastery of his guns, and isn’t afraid to throw hands.

DEADPOOL

While Deadpool’s insanity and jokey nature often lets him look like a fool, that couldn’t be more from the truth. Deadpool has shown to be pretty intelligent when he needs to be. 

He’s shown great knowledge on integration, has made several unique jokes with rare overlap with each other, managed to land a job selling pre owned cars, has shown to be bilingual, knew how to work Cable’s Time Watch pretty well, can somehow paint, is skilled at climbing, and despite what he likes to do he can be quite good at de-escalating situations if he really wants to.

But just like Blitzø, Deadpool displays his intelligence best when fighting. Deadpool has been killing ever since he was a teenager and when he turned 18 he joined the Canadian Special Operations Forces Command and afterwards became an assassin with over 40 confirmed kills. After going through his mutation his killcount skyrocketed into the hundreds! He’s able to make use of his limited ammo as he killed an entire gang with only 12 bullets. Deadpool however fights best at close range as his skills with his Katana’s are no joke, being able to stab in precise locations and match Wolverine who is a trained WW2 veteran with hundreds of years of experience. Deadpool is also not afraid to fight hand to hand as he uses his great agility with his styles of Judo and Jiu-Jitsu with some decent boxing skills along with it.

RESISTANCES

BLITZØ

Heat Resistance: Imps are immune to earth fire.

Pain Resistance: Imps are super resilient as seen above with previous examples.

Limited Poison Resistance: Like dawg, read the Imp physiology to see the resistances, there is no point in repeating.

RESISTANCES

• Heat Resistance: Deadpool has survived explosions and can take fire blasts from Firefist.

• Extreme Cold Resistance: Was in the arctic waters for a long period of time and came out of it only slightly shivering.

• Disease Resistance: His Healing Factor attacks his Cancer as fast as it can form.

• Poison Resistance: Has drank Bleach and was unaffected.

• Matter & Antimatter Resistance: Survived the short-circuiting of the Time Ripper which contained Matter and Antimatter mixing.

• Limited Deconstruction Resistance: Matter and Antimatter mixing creates Atomic destruction and Deadpool was not destroyed when it was spread to Wolverine as well.

FEATS

BLITZØ

• Defeated: Striker, Andrealphus, Dhorks, Crimson and his Mob, Rolando, Several Humans

• Stood up against the Higher Class Demons

• Has killed hundreds of humans

• Kept up with Fizzarolli in the Circus

• Got his hands on the Grimoire

• Has a HUGE collection of horse toys

• Helped kickstart Indie Animation

• Getting a Crossover with Hazbin Hotel (FINALLY!)

STRENGTH

• Shot through this guys head

• Sliced a man in half

• Blew up a TV

• Punched a hole in a wall

• Lifted his Emergen-c Bag which contained his “MY D***”

• Casually lifts Loona

• Restrained Loona

• Snapped a guys neck

• Lifted all this paperwork

• Busted down his own door

• Became the Kool Aid Man

• Kicked a goat hard enough to create an explosion

SPEED

• Casually caught an arrow

• Drew a picture pretty fast

• Dodged holy arrows

• Teleported, again!

• Dodged a net shot

• Avoided a bunch of attacks

• Reacted to Millie’s knife toss

DURABILITY

• Got fucking yeeted

• Took all this abuse from Loona

• Endured a beating from a mob

• Got used as a weapon

• Hit the ground hard enough to crack it

• Got trampled by a crowd

• His body could easily handle a beating from Millie

• Could survive a fall from space (9.2 Megajoules)

• Survived Loo Loo Land exploding (6.8 - 78.37 Tons)

DEADPOOL

• Defeated: Francis, Firefist, Cable, Wolverine, Cassandra Nova, Mr. Paradox, Deadpool Corps, Fox’s Death

• Saved his timeline from dying

• Rescued all the children in the Mutant Rehabilitation

• Escaped The Void

• Helped raise money for Cancer

• Survived Fox and Disney’s merge

• Has the most successful R-Rated trilogy of all time

• Managed to get his movies despite all the bullshit that happened behind the scenes

STRENGTH

• Snapped a man’s neck with his legs

• Lifted a man with his Katanas

• Tosses several people around

• Twisted a large metal pipe around Cable’s neck

• The entire Bye Bye Bye sequence

SPEED

• Catches an axe toss with ease

• Dodges Firefists fire blasts

• Can parry Wolverine’s slices

• Deflected a snipe

• Slices a bullet in half (Mach 5.8 - 6.2)

• Saw a car crash stand still (Mach 47.46)

• Did Santa’s trip (Mach 437,015)

DURABILITY

• Survived falling off a bridge and into a car

• Went through a crate and hit a metal wall

• Deadpool gets launched by Firefist

• Deadpool survives a big explosion

• Was stuck in a truck that got sent through a bridge

• Took a beating from Juggernaut

• Got sent through a thick wall

• And was also sent through a car roof

• Survived a Gas Explosion (338.9 Megajoules)

• Survived Matter and Antimatter mixing See Before Verdict

SCALING

BLITZØ

I.M.P

Being the leader of I.M.P, it makes sense that Blitzø should be the most well rounded compared to his employees. He’s capable of taking abuse from Millie and Loona and is able to trade blows if necessary. He’s also on par with Striker who fought M+M and almost beat them if it wasn’t for a surprise attack.

• Poor Moxxie : (

• Moxxie got crushed by Lyle

• Moxxie was chewed on by a shark

• Moxxie blocked a bullet

• Millie also blocked a bullet from Striker

• Moxxie had a boulder smashed into him

• Moxxie pushed a giant statue

• This entire scene lol

• Millie reacted to a missile

• Millie was basically unharmed from a Rocket Launcher

• Millie could hypothetically could rip people apart

• Loona punched a guy pretty hard

• Loona got punched in the jaw very hard

• Millie moved fast enough that she ignited (Mach 5)

• Moxxie moved in tandem with a bullet (Mach 2 - 5.1)

• Millie created a crater (10.8 Megajoules)

• Millie killed a fish which could do this (25.5 Megajoules)

OTHER IMPS

Blitzø was capable of defeating Striker who is considered one of the strongest Imp’s ever, so Blitzø should naturally upscale any feats here.

• Fizz's limbs stretched pretty fast

• Fizz can smash through objects

• Fizz made a mark in a metal cage

• Striker easily lifted a hog with one arm

• Striker caught Stolas

• Striker threw around a boulder

• Striker ripped a giant rock open

• Striker got crushed by a statue

• Fizz dodged Blitzø’s sniper (Mach 1.46 - 26.7)

• Backgrounder survived this hypersonic rollercoaster (9.56 Tons)

CHERUBS

IMP has been able to defeat the Cherubs twice, the second time with further enhancements via mech suits, so scaling should be valid.

• Can lift a boulder

• Created this hole in the wall

• Missiles can create this much damage

OTHER HELLBORN

IMP has killed several other Hellborn as well, so let’s go through all their impressive feats!

…

HUMANS

It’s IMP’s entire job to kill humans, scaling should only be natural

• Martha blasted a hole through her house

• And another one through a tree

• A random Child got sent through the roof and lived

• Another one got spiked hard enough to create a Yamcha pose crater

• And got sent in deeper

• The Dhorks can take hits from goats…

• ...and these goats are pretty tough

SINNERS

It might seem weird to say that Blitzø could scale to Sinners since they are higher in the hiearchy (which is fan made but whatever) and generally portrayed as stronger but there is evidence that they should. A Robo Fizz (which should be a weaker model) was able to hurt Cherri and outpace her. Also the weapons I.M.P use are the same ones that can make Sinners puddles in the ground. Now it’s fair to rebuttal with Cherri one-shotting the Robo Fizz but not only is it a weaker model, but Blitzø should upscale in speed and his weapons should scale regardless if you buy the physical scaling or not.

• Angel Dust got hit pretty hard

• Pentious fell out of his Ship

• Sir Pentious throws Angel Dust pretty hard

• And the toss is pretty fast (Mach 0.14)

• Dodged these electric bolts (Mach 0.16)

• Egg Boiz (Technically not a Sinner but I’m not making a separate section for them lmao) moved in tandem with a laser (0.15 C - 0.53 C) Egg Boiz can officially blitz everyone in the WWW Blog series aside from Sonic, Pac-Man, and Fluffy. I don’t know how to feel.

• Baxter moved faster than Vox can travel (0.58 C - 2.35 C)

• Pentious anked an explosion created by Alastor (37 Tons)

• He also survives Alastor’s Ship attack (93 Tons - 2.3 Kilotons)

ARS GOETIA

Hoo boy, here we go! While the Ars Goetia are far above the lower tier of the verse, Sinsmas fucked up the scaling system! I.M.P battled Andrealphus and hurt his ice monster along with him? This will be talked about in its validity later but for now, here’s how strong these guys (really only Stolas lmao) are!

• Dodged these bullets

• Survived a celestial body being ripped apart (1.3 Tons - 162.9 Kilotons) See Before Verdict

• Opened up the clouds with a portal (1.8 Megatons - 2.5 Gigatons) See Before Verdict

• Moved this fast (2.2 C - 15.7 C) Debatable, See Before Verdict

• Might’ve survived a supernova from a distance? (509 Teratons - 1.9 Petatons) Debatable, See Before Verdict

• Might’ve moved planets into a Supernova? (4.1 Quettatons - 1.9 Foe) Debatable, See Before Verdict

OVERLORDS

Obviously Blitzø physically shouldn’t scale, but even regular Sinners (who Blitzø upscales in that category) are able to keep up in terms of speed such as Cherri Bomb when fighting Valentino. Weapon strength is another complicated subject but it will be discussed in full detail later.

• Husk dodged gunfire (Mach 2.1)

• Alastor dodged Valentino’s gunfire (Mach 40)

• Vox can travel through wires (0.5 C - 0.99 C)

• Vox created a Blackout by getting angry (83 Kilotons - 181 Megatons)

• All the Overlords (except for Vox) supported the effort in keeping the Might of Lillith going “ka-blooey” (134.09 Gigatons - 781.21 Teratons) See Before Verdict

SCALING

WOLVERINE’S

Deadpool had two entire fight scenes with this guy and while he lost the first fight, the second one he made Wolverine bleed with a headbutt with pure brute force and the conclusion ended with both knocked out. So scaling to both variants (MCU Wolverine can keep up with characters who scale to FOX Wolverine) is 100% valid.

• Easily knocked out Pyro in one hit (who stomped Human Torch)

• Blocks an Optic Blast (0.02 C)

• Got hit by an attack worth the force of a Category 5 Hurricane (31 Megatons)

• Also survived Matter and Antimatter mixing See Before Verdict

THE RESISTANCE

Deadpool fought on par with the rest of the resistance and supposedly the guys they killed managed to beat the eliminated members (Magneto, Punisher, Human Torch, Daredevil, and Quicksilver).

• Daredevil can evade bullets

• Magneto launched Wolverine pretty fast (Mach 23.46)

• Blade got cratered (11.8 - 248 Megajoules)

• Human Torch survived a missile (0.6 Tons)

• Gambit destroys a large concrete chunk (1.74 Tons)

• Quicksilver KE is good (824 Megatons)

• Magento bent Wolverine’s Skeleton Debatable, See Before Verdict

• Magneto could create a massive earthquake Debatable, See Before Verdict

• Magento could bend the magnetic field of the Earth (23.9 Gigatons) Debatable, See Before Verdict

• Human Torch could hypothetically set the atmosphere on fire (4.6 Petatons) Debatable, See Before Verdict

OTHER FRIENDS

Deadpool should obviously scale to some of the lower tier ones since he can trade blows with their enemies. Now normally he doesn't scale to Colossus, not only is he able to take hits from other people in Colossus’ weight class, but his Adimantium Katanas should be superior.

• Colossus tosses a tire very far

• Firefist sends Colossus flying into a truck

• Cable got shot by his own gun

• Cable pulled off a car door mid crash

• Colossus blocked a bus slam

• Negasonic made a huge explosion (304 Tons)

X-MEN

Wolverine has been able to throw hands with the enemies of the X-Men and Sabertooth, who is someone Wolverine is superior to, has survived Storm’s lightning and she is one of the strongest X-Men (with the exception of Jean Grey who he obviously doesn’t scale to). Since Deadpool scales to Wolverine, he should scale to these guys shown below.

• Cannonball destroys a door (581.8 Megajoules)

• Novelization implied Pyro could vaporize a building (29.7 Tons)

• Cyclops’ beams could punch through a mountain (175.2 Tons)

• Storms lightning could have destroyed a dam (355 Tons - 2.3 Kilotons)

MCU LOWER TIERS

This might sound strange but Deadpool should scale to the more grounded characters of the MCU. Deadpool is able to defeat the Minutemen who have proven to be physically on par with Loki, he himself has fought and taken hits from Captain America and Iron Man. Cap is also on par with Spider-Man who is considered one of the strongest street tiers meaning Deadpool should be pretty high in the Street side of the MCU.

• Iron Man has some fast flight speed (Mach 46.2)

• Iron Man reacted to a Power Stone blast (0.02 C)

• Multiple characters have reacted to Iron Man’s repulsor blasts which are stated to be moving at lightspeeds.

• Yeleena survives a bad CGI explosion (2.2 Megajoules)

• Cap tosses Ultron through a pillar (54.6 Megajoules)

• Spider-Man pulls a Ferry together temporally (329.6 Megajoules)

• Shuri and Namor survive a ship blowing up while inside (3.5 Gigajoules)

• Loki survives Thor’s explosion (15 - 117 Tons)

• Iron Man survives a shockwave from Thor (2.8 Kilotons)

• Iron Man’s lasers are 200 Petawatts (47.8 Megatons) Debatable, See Before Verdict

• His lasers pre Nano Tech would be this strong… (4.78 Gigatons) Debatable, See Before Verdict

MCU HIGHER TIERS

Obviously Deadpool shouldn’t scale in strength, but even the lowest tiers can react to Pre-Awakening Thor and Thanos fairly consistently meaning speed feats are fine (although all the ones where there is no question on scaling aren’t that good lol). Deadpool’s Adamantium Katanas could possibly scale in strength, which will be elaborated on later.

• Ancient One’s speed (3 C) Debatable, See Before Verdict

• Captain Marvel’s Photon Blasts have an absurd statement (333.56 C) Debatable, See Before Verdict

• Thor created an earthquake (499 Gigatons - 731 Teratons) See Before Verdict

• Khonshu moves the Moon (2.5 Yottatons) See Before Verdict

• Rocket has guns that can blow up Moon’s (5.8 Yottatons) See Before Verdict

• Power Stone wipes out a planet (23.1 Yottatons) See Before Verdict

• Captain Marvel reignites a sun (71.3 Quettatons) See Before Verdict

• Celestials' existence is pretty busted (294.4 RonnaFoe) See Before Verdict

OTHER CHARACTERS IN THE MULTIVERSE

Finally, let’s just go through other feats that Deadpool likely scales to (or not).

• Francis dodges bullets

• Amazing Spider-Man dodges lightning (Mach 943)

• Sabertooth dodges Cyclops’ Optic Blasts (0.53 C)

• Silver Surfer can travel across entire galaxies Debatable, See Before Verdict

• Green Goblin’s Pumpkin Bombs are pretty strong (4.5 - 5.9 Tons)

• Morbius actually has an impressive feat (7.4 Tons)

• Electro’s lighting is also pretty strong (28 Tons)

• Ghost Rider tanks the Carbon Bomb (600 Megatons)

WEAKNESSES

BLITZØ

“No. You’re right. I actually am, you know, sorry. I-I don’t want to be this way, not forever.”

Blitzø is very flawed, even without looking at his life story. He is very impulsive and often goes into battles “winging it.” His trauma has also occasionally clouded his judgement and is generally pretty easy to anger. He also lacks the regenerative powers of other demons so he has to be more careful when taking in damage and has shown to be threatened by magic since he has no real counter to it. Finally, his tendency to make jokes and witty remarks can occasionally let his guard down or not take a situation seriously until it’s too late.

DEADPOOL

“I care. I know I turn everything into a joke, but I care, and I want to use that feeling for something important. I want to matter, need to show my girl I matter.”

Just like Blitzø, Deadpool has significant flaws even without bringing up his life. While his tendency to make jokes can help in some situations, it also can let his guard down and leave him open to attacks. Speaking of being open to attacks, Deadpool’s Regeneration is so strong that Deadpool has become a little more sloppy on defending himself since he’s used to recovering from everything that hits him. His Regeneration also can take a long time to heal large wounds such as severed limbs. Finally, if Deadpool’s brain is damaged, it can leave him in a “silly” state of sorts. Given that Wolverine got amnesia from his brain being damaged, it’s likely a similar thing could possibly happen if his brain is attacked to a violent amount.

Also he has a Unicorn fetish, that’s just plain gross.

BEFORE WE END THINGS!

BLITZØ

STOLAS SCALING

Let’s talk about EVERYONE’S favourite Hellaverse character to scale, Stolas, YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!

So the first thing you might bring up is this little thing that has barely been mentioned anywhere except for powerscaling reasons…

So most people would take a look at this and be done with the idea of Blitzø scaling to Stolas. Stolas is 4 entire tiers above Blitzø, he should be styling on Blitzø right? Well…

This thing exists. So in the final battle of Sinsmas, I.M.P was able to fight Andrealphus (a Goetia that should be comparable) and they were evading attacks from him and Loona even ripped open his throat briefly! Not to mention that when Stolas was depowered, he was able to beat the crap out of Andrealphus with him coughing out blood. This outright contradicts the Hell Hierarchy right? It’s a one off?

Wait, wasn’t Stolas depowered here? This doesn’t make any sense, how can the Imps jump so high in the tiers? The tiers are 100% power based right? Well… not fully. While the tiers are somewhat power based, it is more of a political system than a power. For example, the rest of the Hellborn aren’t so much stronger that the Imps can’t keep up, and Hellhounds are literally the muscle and they’re the lowest. Imps and those who scale to them have also kept up with Sinners. Also Overlords and Lillith were once Sinners who gained the social and magical influence to become as strong as they are. Ars Goetia are actually quite physically weak with several showings of their lack of physical strength.

So if the lower tiers can casually keep up with the Ars Goetia, how come they can’t really compete with them and are convinced of them being unstoppable? There are actually 2 simple reasons for why.

1: While the Ars Goetia lack physical strength, they make up for it with their regeneration and immortality. Unless you have Angelic Weaponry which is extremely hard to find and expensive to purchase, they won’t permanently stay dead.

2: This is the big one, magic! While the Imps are able to fight and hurt Ars Goetia, the moment they go all out with their magic is when they are unable to fight back. There’s a reason why when Striker tried to assassinate Stolas he restricted him with an angelic rope so his powers would be nulled, because otherwise he would’ve never stood a chance. Also once Andrealphus got serious and locked in, I.M.P was helpless and needed Stolas’ daughter to save him, and she needed to use magic in order to stop Andrealphus.

So that’s it right? Blitzø can scale to Stolas physically but he has absolutely zero way of scaling to Stolas’ magic right? Well, there is a way you could argue Blitzø scaling to an aspect of Stolas’ magic and that’s with specific weaponry!

While I.M.P’s attacks on the Ice Monster were ultimately ineffective, the Goetia’s weapons were able to damage the Ice Monster significantly, and the Ice Monster is a creation of Andrealphus’ magic. It also makes sense since the magicless Goetia’s need a way to keep up with the magic users so weapons as strong as their magic make sense. In fairness, when Andrealphus went all out Blitzø was unable to put up a fight so that could be used to debunk the weapons strength. However, Andrealphus’ attacks’ range and width were too big for Blitzø to properly counter so that could be used as a defense for scaling. Also, all the impressive feats the Goetia do are very casual and they should scale above Overlords since their magic has shown to be stronger, they are stated to be more powerful, and there isn’t any evidence of the Overlords being comparable to the Goetia’s magic (Also we’ve seen Overlords being affected by basic weapons before so it’s possible you could scale Blitzø’s basic weapons to them possibly, not much evidence that it is 100% scaling but figured it should be mentioned as supporting evidence).

TL;DR: Blitzø physically scales to the physical feats of Stolas and Goetia's weapons more than likely scales to Stolas’ magic and the Overlords.

Anyway, there aren't any controversial Stolas feats right?

…

(Sigh) I really typed sigh didn’t I? Also there are a couple of weird feats that aren’t there. The cloud and celestial body being ripped apart are fairly simple and inarguable for validity, however Stolas’ other feats would beg to differ.

STOLAS’ TRAVEL SPEEDS?

So a notable feat that everyone always brings up with Stolas is him moving very fast in this scene. Does it look confusing? Welcome to the club. Now it is clear that Stolas did travel a distance since in the beginning he was near the star while at the end of the scene he was a safe distance away from it. However there are some questions that still appear.

1: Didn’t Striker catch Stolas mid flight, aren’t the Imps only bullet timers? - People always bring this up but not only have the imps fully perceived and reacted to the Goetia’s magic before making this point null, but Blitzø can scale to Sinners and Overlords in speed who have reacted to characters who should be faster. Other people say he only got lucky which regardless of your opinion of the character, it’s kind of disingenuous to say a character who’s meant to be incredibly skilled “got lucky.” This is also the equivalent of going “Yeah Kraven has only dodged bullets, so he shouldn’t scale to the lightspeed feats even though he fights people who do.” So yeah, this point doesn’t debunk the speed very well.

2: Couldn't Stolas have teleported? - This point on the other hand is a far better debunk. We do know Stolas can teleport and since we never saw how exactly Stolas traveled it is entirely possible and would be in character for him.

So while the Imps should be comparable in speed, the exact flight speed feat is questionable. While the feat can’t be proven to be teleportation, it can’t be proven to be raw speed alone either. Consider this a high end.

DID STOLAS TANK A SUPERNOVA?

So this is a pretty big feat, this would buff the verse by a good amount, if it was actually a feat! Yeah despite what the calcs shown say, Stolas never actually took any type of force from the Supernova. You might say that the shockwave still hit him but not only the lack of Stolas’ hair moving imply that it didn’t reach him, but math disagrees. Yeah, I’m busting out the calculator to debunk this!

Stolas’ possible travel lasted at most 11 seconds and his speed was at lowballed 2.2 times faster than light. Meanwhile the shockwave was only present for 5 seconds before the portal closed. Keep in mind, the speed of a Supernova’s shockwave is 10% the speed of light meaning it would’ve only reached around 22.7% of the distance Stolas traveled. The only way for the shockwave to hit Stolas was if he let the portal up for 22 seconds rather than 5. Even then, the feat would be so far above everyone’s physical tier that it would’ve been considered an outlier anyways.

So yeah, this feat isn’t even real to begin with.

COSMIC TIER STOLAS?

Finally we have the last Stolas related thing and it comes from… Loo Loo Land again… AND THE EXACT SAME SCENE AS I HAD TO TALK ABOUT TWO TIMES BEFORE JUST NOW! Welp, let’s do this one last time. So an argument to get Stolas’ magic to the Dwarf Star to Large Star level ranges is him supposedly moving planets. However, is he?

While it would make sense for Stolas to be moving these planets with his telekinesis, it isn’t conveyed super well that he is. Sure the planets have an outline that could signify his telekinesis is doing the trick, but there are clear problems. Firstly, the planets had colored outlines before so that immediately removes the telekinesis point completely. Secondly, Stolas was already carrying his daughter and if you buyed the idea of him teleporting then him using telekinesis is even more unlikely. Finally, whenever Stolas uses his powers it is very clear he is using them due to a visual effect, in this scene there are no visual effects from Stolas.

So sadly it is unlikely Stolas could scale to this.

There, let’s talk about some non Stolas and Loo Loo Land things now.

THE KA-BLOOEY THAT BUFFED THE VERSE!

So the Might of Lillith’s explosion feat was pretty impressive right? Or is it?

It is. I’ve seen a few people question how people scale to this, but you guys watched the scene right? They did create a forcefield that successfully covered the blast, this is a legit feat that needs to be talked about. However, there are a couple other questions that need to be answered.

1: Are the Might of Lillith calcs inflated? - Possibly, but it is the safest calc. While there are other calcs that get to smaller yields, it’s hard to say if they are more accurate or just a dramatic lowball instead. We don’t have many frames of reference for the size of the Pentagram besides its population which is so far the best bet for calculating. Pixel measuring the city sounds like the best bet on paper but they aren’t perfect calculations on the size by just looking at the buildings, it is meant to be a city that could fit billions of souls and that’s just the number that existed after the exterminations, there used to be a whole lot more of these guys! The largest city in the world is Tokyo and that has a population only in the millions, and destroying it gets to Mountain - Island levels so the calc actually doesn’t seem TOO farfetched in comparison.

2: How much effort is actually being put in by each person? - That’s a good question, as powerful as Charlie, Emily, and the Overlords are, it’s pretty clear that one of them wasn’t enough for the whole blast. There are 2 possible ways to determine the effort.

Low End: Assume Charlie and Emily contributed 99% of the effort and the other 12 Overlords contributed 1% all combined.

High End: Assume everyone in the group of 14 put equal effort in.

Both results aren’t perfect since it’s clear that Charlie and Emily are more powerful than the Overlords, but to assume that the Overlords contributed such a little amount is flawed. But overall these are the best ends so just make a number in between I guess. So let’s just quickly show off the 4 potential power outputs of 1 Overlord by using the Low and High Ends of the Calc and the Effort theories.

Low End: (134.09 Gigatons / 12) x 0.01 = 111.7 Megatons of TNT

Low-Mid End: (134.09 Gigatons /14) = 9.58 Gigatons of TNT

Mid-High End: (781.21 Teratons / 12) x 0.01 = 651 Gigatons of TNT

High End: (781.21 Teratons / 14) = 55.8 Teratons of TNT

Keep in mind this is only scaling for the Goetia weapons, nothing else.

WHERE’S THE HIGH TIER SCALING?

So I left out a few guys off of the scaling, mainly the 4 strongest characters in the series aside from literal god himself! Shouldn’t the Goetia’s weapons scale to them? Well unfortunately they shouldn’t. Charlie already surpasses Overlords and the Goetia and power and she was struggling in her fight with Adam. Not to mention Adam was considered far above Alastor’s league and when he stopped holding back he instantly won. Meanwhile, Stolas at least warrants a thought in terms of who’d win. The other 3 here scale far above him and in general are way higher in scale than the rest of the series, so scaling is problematic. 

Now an argument the Might of Lillith is powered by Lucifer so since Charlie and friends stopped the explosion they could scale to the laser that pierced Heaven, but there are significant problems with this. Lucifer wasn’t fully powering up the final explosion, it was the cannon overloading from all the energy. Also Lucifer was actively being sucked of his power and considering Angelic steel nulls powers it likely weakened him as the cannon kept going. Scaling would also create an inconsistency since Lucifer himself can’t harm Sinners meaning it had to be the weapon itself doing the explosion and not Lucifer powering up the explosion. Also considering how much stronger Lucifer is, scaling to him is just wrong to begin with.

TL;DR: Goetia weapons are strong but they do not scale to the highest tiers.

DEADPOOL

THE MATTER & ANTIMATTER FEAT!?

So at the end of “Deadpool and Wolverine”, the two guys in the title of the movie stopped Cassandra Nova from using the Timer Ripper to destroy all the timelines by using each other as a circuit. Now while I was focused on the cool Like A Prayer song, and other people on Hugh Jackman’s abs, apparently other powerscalers focused on the “Destroy all Timelines” part and concluded that Deadpool and Wolverine are Multiversal threats. Let’s correct that since there are more holes in this than the cheese I put in my sandwich that I am eating in the middle of making this Blog.

So while it might seem like they are tanking the energy required to destroy entire timelines, in actuality they aren’t. Cassandra Nova isn’t using the Time Ripper as an Orbital Laser or something, she’s redirecting the Matter and Antimatter that is powering up the machine to spread across the timeline to eventually reach across the entire timeline and then mix them together to destroy it. Didn’t Deadpool and Wolverine tank the entire thing? Not really, they instead short circuited the feeds that the Matter and Antimatter was traveling through and overloaded the machine into exploding, killing Cassandra.

So instead of surviving the force of the universe imploding, they instead fed the machine back its own power. Even then, it would be a massive outlier for Deadpool as he clearly isn’t anywhere near Multiversal or even Universal levels of power physically. But how impressive is it since it is clearly an impressive feat?

This actually has a much simpler explanation, Deadpool and Wolverine together did survive Matter and Antimatter fusing in the end so they would scale to that, which can get up to 43 Kilotons of TNT. But since it’s a shared feat, it will be divided in half since it was clear the full explosion would be too much.

TL;DR: This whole feat would at most be worth 21.5 Kilotons of TNT for Deadpool.

LET’S TALK ABOUT DEADPOOL’S REGENERATION!

So a common question I’ve been asked personally about this Blog is usually “How is Blitzø going to get past Deadpool’s Regeneration?” I was going to mention it during his Regeneration segment or weaknesses, but considering how often I’ve seen people question this I might as well give this topic its own segment.

So, is Blitzø royally screwed because of Deadpool’s Regeneration?

Surprisingly No!

Yeah despite what people may think, Deadpool’s Regeneration does have its limits. While he is able to heal bullet wounds pretty quickly, when it comes to limbs it usually takes a day for it to heal back into peak condition again. We’ve even seen that it does take some time for him to heal back from being blown apart.

Now you might counter by the fact that he survived Matter and Antimatter fusing but it was made clear that if he had to actually get de-atomized, he would’ve died.

This actually gives Blitzø wincons! If he manages to rip off Deadpool’s head, blow him to bits, or leave him in a condition where he is unable to move for a long period of time, this will mean that Deadpool would have to wait a long while to try again. Blitzø could simply open a portal to dump Deadpool into lava in order to finish him off or just simply leave since he did technically beat him.

TL;DR: If Blitzø removes Deadpool’s head from his body in any shape or form or leaves Deadpool in a condition where he can’t move, it will be considered a win for him.

WHERE DOES ADAMANTIUM SCALE?

In Deadpool and Wolverine, Deadpool’s Katana’s got upgraded from your typical steel into the elusive Adamantium that the MCU has been recently pushing out as a hot new thing. But how strong are these blades?

To no surprise, it has been noted to be a super durable metal, even stated to be stronger than Vibranium! While some might say this is only a statement, the narrative implies this to be true as the wrong hands getting a hold of Adamantium is considered dangerous when there are multiple heroes with Vibranium.

Alright, but just because it’s very durable doesn’t mean its AP translates right? Well… no it exactly translates. We’ve seen that Vibranium is able to leave visible marks on other Vibranium weapons so the same should translate to Adamantium.

Since Adamantium is stronger than Vibranium, it should naturally upscale where Vibranium is. While Vibranium is weaker the Uru as Thanos’ blade did rip Cap’s shield apart, it did take a while so it should somewhat scale to the impressive things Uru has going for it being the metal of the Strongest Weapons in the Universe which includes Rocket’s Moon Busting Gun and other high tiers that were unable to break it. Weaker metals such as Iron Man’s armor were also able to block attacks from the Power Stone and Kree Metals were able to contain it with little issue. So everything inferior to the Power Stone and Uru should be something Adamantium scales to. Finally, the Celestial’s skeleton is made of Adamantium so obviously it should scale to the casual feats it can perform and upscale any feat shown in the Scaling.

HOWEVER, this would only scale to Deadpool’s Katana’s made of Adamantium, NOTHING ELSE!

MAGENTO SCALING?

So probably the biggest elephant in the room with the Resistance scaling was Magento. Because Cassandra’s goons who Deadpool killed managed to kill Magento that means “Deadpool > Magento” right? Sadly this is a pretty bad argument.

Literally every confrontation between Wolverine (someone who is on par with Deadpool) usually ends with Magneto as the easy winner. Magento’s magnetism is on such a higher level to Deadpool that it isn’t even funny. 

So how did Cassandra and her goons kill Magneto? We don’t know since it was off screen but considering that Magneto is fairly weak physically, it is more than likely they managed to get a blow in that finished him, either that or Cassandra herself stepped in and eliminated him.

JOHNNY’S STORM!

In Fantastic Four, Reed states “Not only could you kill yourself, but you could set fire to the earth’s atmosphere and destroy all human life as we know it.” So does Deadpool scale? DID YOU READ THAT ENTIRE STATEMENT?!?! Reed literally states that if he did that everyone would die, including himself. BuT wHaT aBoUt PyRo?! WHAT ABOUT PYRO!? He absorbed Johnny’s flames when he was under Supernova, not during Supernova. Scaling Deadpool to this proves you can’t listen.

IRON MAN SCALING?

Considering that most people scale Iron Man higher than the Street Tiers (not just in the comics), it might sound strange that Deadpool and all the other Street Tiers could scale to Iron Man. While the Lower Tiers like Daredevil and Black Widow would struggle to scale, the higher tiers such as Wolverine, Captain America, Spider-Man, and of course Deadpool should actually scale to pre Nano Tech Iron Man Armors, or at least the 400 Petawatt lasers!

Why do they scale? Quite simply, multiple characters tanked multiple lasers after the 400 Petawatt upscale into the 40 Exawatts!

The immediate counter to this would be that Iron Man wasn’t trying to hurt them too badly and thus wasn’t using the full firepower. Honestly, for a while this was a point that couldn’t be avoided since Iron Man was using non lethal attacks on Cap and he even used armor not designed for combat.

However, there are two pieces of evidence for people in Deadpool’s weight class for scaling.

1: Loki - Once again, Loki is carrying the Lower tiers for scaling! While Iron Man would probably be holding back against Cap, Loki is one that he would have little reason to. Maybe he was when he first shot him in the beginning of the film but by the end he would have little reason to. Even if you don’t buy that, the second point is pretty hard to debunk…

2: Ultron - Yeah, Ultron and Cap had an extended fight scene, and Ultron landed several blows with his lasers at Cap and Cap wasn’t too badly injured. Ultron would have no reason to hold back since he was actively trying to kill the Avengers during the entire movie! Ultron should also be superior to those older Iron Man models considering he could keep up with Iron Man’s armors in Age of Ultron.

As surprising as it may be, Deadpool should be in a similar ballpark with Pre Nano Tech Iron Man since other characters in Deadpool’s weight class have been able to tank attacks from Iron Man and keep up with him! That should make up for the previous two nopes right?

VARIOUS MCU SPEED FEATS

So let’s finish this pretty long BTV with a lightning round of the various speed feats and whether Deadpool could scale to or not.

• Ancient One Astral Form: So during the Ancient One’s death, her Astral Form viewed the world moving incredibly slow, slow enough to view lightning move very sluggishly. While a pretty simple feat that would normally be pretty simple to use, the only problem is if anyone could scale to the Astral Form. On the one hand, Ancient One is able to view Astral Forms moving at normal speeds with no issue. On the other hand, no one has really “reacted” to the Astral Forms. There are decent arguments on both sides so this feat will be a debatable high end.

• Captain Marvel’s Photon Blast: In the novelization of Captain Marvel, her Photon Blasts speed was described to be able to move at a nanosecond. While this sounds good on paper there are some problems with using this. This feat is more than likely a hyperbole, writers use it all the time and there is nothing backing up the idea that her Photon Blast can move at such speeds. It’s also inconsistent with how actual Photons work as they can only move at lightspeeds. Sadly, this feat would need more evidence before being considered legitimate.

• The MFTL+ Space Travel Stuff: So there are a couple MFTL+ feats in the MCU, most of which like Thor and Captain Marvel’s MFTL+ travels can be chalked up to being sheer Travel Speed and the fact that nobody would scale to them in speed since they are considered too high for the rest of the verse. Silver Surfer on the other hand is a little more complicated as the Human Torch was briefly able to keep up with him, however it is more than likely that Silver Surfer wasn’t going all out since he’s shown to be languages ahead of Johnny when not holding back. So no evidence of scaling.

TL;DR: Ancient One’s feat will be considered a high end, Captain Marvel’s feat lacks evidence to be valid, and Deadpool doesn’t scale to Silver Surfer.

GET READY!

All the Guns have been reloaded, and the melee weapons have been sharpened. Place your bets! Who’ll win? Who’ll go home the winner? Who’ll suffer humiliation or death? Why do I smell chimichangas being made in my toaster oven? Let’s see…

Who

Would

WIN!

FIGHT SCRIPT

(God I love Voice Actors who love their fanbases)

Enjoy!

VERDICT

You know the drill…

ABILITIES

Both Blitzø and Deadpool share many abilities with each other. They share enhanced senses with being able to notice things at a superhuman rate, are able to break the 4th wall, and have shown proficiency in acrobatics.

It is clear though that when it comes to who has more abilities, Blitzø is the clear winner. His ability to just randomly teleport is something that would throw off Deadpool in a fight. Even if you don’t buy that and assume it’s just cartoon logic, Blitzø’s unique physiology gives him many natural advantages over Deadpool. His climbing abilities gives him superior traversal potential, has generally shown better stealth, night vision could be useful if you wanted this fight to take place at night, and most useful his tail gives him a huge versatility boost and will be something Deadpool will have to keep his eyes on unless he wants to get grappled or stabbed.

Despite this, while Blitzø wins quantity, Deadpool’s quality manages to be more useful here. Simply put, most of Blitzø’s abilities are something Deadpool could overcome or has faced before, meanwhile Deadpool’s Regeneration is something that will be tricky for Blitzø. While his Regeneration has its limits, the fact is that it will be a roadblock for Blitzø for a good while since it’s not something he’s great at fighting at. Also considering how quickly he’s able to heal from bullet wounds, this means that if Blitzø wants to put Deadpool down he’d have to fight him in a style of fighting that he isn’t as used to.

Even if Blitzø hypothetically uses Angelic Weaponry, Deadpool’s busted pain tolerance would be able to let him endure more attacks than he should. While Blitzø also does have some good endurance, it doesn’t quite go to the extent of Deadpool’s. Blitzø can twist his neck and take bullets, but Deadpool can have his limbs ripped off and get shot left and right by everything and barely notice and keep fighting like nothing happened. It also doesn’t help that between the two it is clear that Deadpool’s Acrobatics is also more impressive as he is able to use it while fighting meanwhile Blitzø hasn’t shown that level of skill with his.

“What about the IMP-terruptions?” While some of them could be useful such as potentially copying Deadpool healing a bullet wound or preventing him from healing for a moment, they are temporary solutions and have a low likelihood of happening considering their chances of activating are random, most of the effects Blitzø would get are useless and it’s more likely Blitzø could get Summon cards which would BFR himself and give Deadpool the win (I guess this is an outcome that wouldn’t result in death I suppose).

Blitzø had some useful abilities for sure, but Deadpool’s would be more useful for the long term. DEADPOOL takes ABILITIES!

ARSENAL

Now this is a more interesting debate as both Blitzø and Deadpool are known for their high amount of weaponry. They both actually share a good amount of their arsenal’s with each other, your typical pistols, shotguns, knives, revolvers, katanas, shovels, and BFR options.

However, despite the huge amount of weapons that both have (seriously, it was a lot to mention) when you look at the versatility of all their weapons it becomes clear as day that Blitzø owns this category. Don’t get it twisted, Deadpool does have the advantage when it comes to a bigger amount of guns at his disposal, but this is padding at the end of the day. Deadpool doesn’t use most of his guns and tends to forget he has them half the time, he’s more likely to use a couple and then go in for the melee kill with his Katana’s. Granted, his Adamantium Katana’s were definitely his best weapons here, but the Goetia weapons could be put in the same “end all be all” boat as the Adamantium Katana’s.

Blitzø on the other hand had several options that Deadpool didn’t have. Such options include, sniping Deadpool from a distance, an easier and more mobile storage for all his weapons, more explosive firepower with the grenades and rocket launchers which if used right could give Deadpool an injury great enough that he would need a day of healing (which would be considered a win), disguises to pull a dupe on Deadpool which could be useful since he doesn’t have an inherit Mind Manipulation Resistance, and Beartraps to set traps NES Jason style. Also while Deadpool’s TemPad is useful, Blitzø has better control of his portals and can use them for non BFR related purposes. Also if you want to give Blitzø the Angelic Rifle he has a way to make a wound that Deadpool couldn’t heal from which would definitely catch Deadpool off guard. It wouldn’t be an instant win thanks to Deadpool’s endurance but it is an extremely useful weapon in an already stacked list.

BuT wHaT aBoUt TiMe TrAvEl? WHAT ABOUT TIME TRAVEL? I see people arguing that Deadpool’s Time Watch would just let him go back in time to kill Blitzø as a baby, but do you realize, DO YOU REALIZE how complicated that is. First of all, Blitzø was born and raised in the Greed Ring which is somewhere Sinners (which Deadpool would be considered by extension) can’t go to, only Hellborn. Second of all, even if Deadpool somehow got past that barrier, he’d have to find Blitzø in a Ring that’s really huge! Yes Deadpool knew where to go during his Time Travel journey but all the places and times he went are very much of the public knowledge while Blitzø isn’t. Simply put, Time Travel is always going to be a very complicated wincon compared to just fighting.

Deadpool certainly had an impressive amount of weapons, but Blitzø’s superior versatility gave him the edge in this category. BLITZØ takes ARSENAL!

SUPPORT & VEHICLES
Let’s be honest, these categories are overall useless to the debate so let’s just push them to the side…

MENTALITY

Back to the necessary conversations for this debate, who would be mentally superior between these two not so well in the head characters? This is actually a tough call as both are pretty similar and have good advantages over each other.

When it comes to intelligence, both have shown pretty similar high highs and low lows. They also have shown to have the same “Run and Gun” mentality so it’s not like intelligence and strategy will be the deciding factor here. Now when it comes to who’s the better fighter that gets complicated. 

When it comes to who’s better at range and using a gun, that’s a free point to Blitzø. While Deadpool is able to kill a whole horde of enemies with only 12 bullets, the fact that he forgot to bring extra ammo is telling enough that Deadpool has his flaws when it comes to a shootout. Deadpool has shown to be outclassed in a firefight before and has more easily lost his guns due to how careless he is. Blitzø on the other hand is a lot more mindful of how he fights in a gun fight and has generally shown better control over the battlefield with his guns. Not to mention his superior versatility and storage mobility would make him quicker to the draw, along with the fact that he has way more options on distancing people such as his Sniper Rifle and Tail.

But what Deadpool lacks in Far Ranged Combat compared to Blitzø, he makes up for his superior Close Ranged Combat! Deadpool primarily uses his Katanas in battles and while Blitzø has several melee weapons as well, it is clear that he isn’t as well versed in them as his guns considering his guns are his primary weapon of choice in the heat of battle. Deadpool has also shown superior training since he was trained in the Canadian Special Operations Forces and his great agility gives him good hand to hand combat. His swordplay is also a force to be reckoned with and has generally shown more impressive feats in close quarters combat such as keeping up with Wolverine and Francis in battle.

So is this a Tie? Well there is one point to solve this category, Experience! While Blitzø is a very experienced killer, he’s been only doing this for around 5 years. Deadpool on the other hand has been killing since he was 18 meaning he has almost 6 times more years of experience than Blitzø. Also keep in mind that Deadpool has fought way more supernatural people. While Blitzø was a bodyguard for a while, it pales in comparison compared to being in the military.

While extremely close, Deadpool’s superior experience edges out here. DEADPOOL takes MENTALITY!

SPEED

Now we’re onto the physical stats and here’s where things get really heated.

Starting off with feats both have shown on their own and both have very consistent bullet timing feats. However, Blitzø doesn’t have any feats higher than this, at most having more Supersonic and Subsonic feats. Deadpool on the other hand has shown to be able to process an entire car crash moving still and complete Santa’s trip which would land him into the High Hypersonic to MHS+ category. Even if you dismiss these feats, Deadpool’s bullet timing feats are not only a bit more consistent but more impressive as him cutting the bullet in half gets to around Mach 6!

But the moment you bring in scaling is when the tides turn into Blitzø’s favor! He should scale to Robo Fizz dodging Sniper rounds and Alastor dodging Valentino’s bullets which could surpass all of Deadpool’s bullet timing feats, he also should scale to Millie’s hypersonic feats. Now Deadpool does have Relativistic scaling by scaling to Wolverine and Sabertooth, but the Egg Boiz of all people are able to match this speed hilariously enough. And out of all the characters in the Hellaverse, Baxter being able to react to Vox surpasses anything Deadpool should standardly scale to. Yes there are laser dodging feats in the MCU, but they all don’t reach the same level of speeds as Baxter since not only did Baxter react more blatantly, but Blitzø should upscale to Baxter while Deadpool should be on the same speed tier as the laser timers.

Now in fairness, if you wanted to scale Deadpool to the Ancient One’s Astral Form, he would be also in the FTL spectrum. However, not only is this debatable to scale due to reasons stated previously, not only is this a minor 1.28 times difference which is so small that it would make speed practically equal, but Blitzø could also be given similar high ends! If you wanted to scale Deadpool to this level of speed, scaling Blitzø to Stolas’ speed feat would be fair game as you have to make similar levels of assumptions which gets to 15 C, 5 times faster than the Ancient One’s 3 C feat.

While Deadpool took an early advantage, Blitzø’s reliable scaling allowed him to surpass anything Deadpool could react to. BLITZØ takes SPEED!

STRENGTH & DURABILITY

Final category that will break up the tie, who is overall stronger and more durable?

When looking at them you’d guess Deadpool would be stronger due to being a lot bigger but when it comes to their feats, Blitzø actually could take the edge when looking at their own feats. Deadpool can snap necks, slice people apart, and lift heavy people, but Blitzø can do the exact same things along with busting through walls and kicking goats hard enough to create explosions! And for the most part durability is the same thing as nothing Deadpool has survived on his own compared to the Loo Loo Land explosion…

…until you remember Deadpool surviving Matter and Antimatter mixing. While it obviously isn’t Multiversal, Deadpool taking in energy worth 21.5 Kilotons of TNT is 274 times stronger than the more shakier high end of the Loo Loo Land explosion. Considering Deadpool has hurt people who can hurt him, his AP would scale and also get the Strength advantage.

However, that is only looking at their individual feats, what about scaling? Most of the certain scaling for Blitzø puts him around the same tier he already was, the Sinners are able to survive attacks worth 2.3 Kilotons which is impressive but almost 10x weaker than Deadpool’s Matter and Antimatter feat. Luckily, Blitzø can physically scale to Stolas surviving a Planet ripping apart which gets to 162.9 Kilotons, 7.5x stronger than Deadpool’s most impressive feats. However, Deadpool can also scale to some of the characters in his universe which would let him scale to Wolverine’s 31 Megatons durability, Quicksilver’s 824 Megatons KE, and most impressively Iron Man’s 4.78 Gigaton lasers! The gap between 4.78 Gigatons and 162.9 Kilotons is over 29,000 times! Yeah, safe to say Deadpool is much stronger than Blitzø.

Now in fairness, Blitzø’s Goetia Weapons could likely surpass Deadpool’s durability with ¾ of the ends, and bullets are able to pierce his skin so Blitzø could likely hurt Deadpool with his weapons. However, Deadpool can instantly win if he gets one hit which is a big problem for Blitzø. 

Also, Deadpool’s Adamantium Katana’s exceed Blitzø’s durability by… over an Octodecillion times than Blitzø’s durability. Jesus. Yeah, DEADPOOL takes STRENGTH & DURABILITY!

CONCLUSION

BLITZØ

“Y'know, my twin sister... She hates me too. For something that I did. And I miss her, every day. We were so fucking close, y'know, we- It's a shitty feeling. But, you just gotta keep trying.”

ADVANTAGES

• Would overall be Faster with most ends

• Better fighter at a distance

• Won’t just stand there and take it

• Superior arsenal with better versatility

• Emergen-c Bag > Hello Kitty Duffle Bag

• Better ranged options

• More explosive firepower

• Rocket Launcher could possibly blow Deadpool to bits, instantly taking him out…

• Angelic Sniper Rifle could stop Deadpool from Regenerating…

• Better control over portals

• Tail could give him an upper hand in distancing himself from Deadpool

• Teleportation could catch Deadpool off guard…

• IMP-terruptions could be useful…

• Brandon Rogers

• Helluva Boss Season 1 is a lot of fun…

TIES

• Both have some similar weapons

• Both have weapons that exceed each others durability

• Can BFR each other

• Similar IQ and BIQ

DISADVANTAGES

• Weaker no matter what way you look at it

• Less experienced

• Deadpool’s Regeneration and Pain Tolerance will be a massive and difficult roadblock no matter what way you look at it

• It will also throw him off initially

• Sneaking up on Deadpool will be a challenge thanks to his senses

• Adamantium is something Blitzø can’t break

• …but Deadpool could simply dodge it

• And really only the Goetia Rocket Launcher could do that

• …but it’s really debatable to give him that

• …however he hasn’t used it in combat before

• … also just as likely to screw him over

• My name is Caine, and I am yo-

• …Season 2 wasn’t that good despite a couple of exceptions

DEADPOOL

“Turns out, I am the world saving type, just look around this table if you want proof. And the best part, sometimes the people we save, they save us right back.”

ADVANTAGES

• Much Stronger and more Durable regardless of end

• Faster with absolute lowest ends…

• Adamantium Katanas are busted

• Better fighter up close

• Superior training

• More experienced

• Regeneration makes killing him really hard…

• Pain Tolerance and Endurance means putting him down won’t be easy

• Superior acrobatics

• Also has used them in combat

• Enhanced Senses counters Blitzø’s stealth

• Greater quantity of guns…

• Cable’s Time Watch could be an instant win if he knew where Blitzø was as a baby…

• Resistances would counter any drug Blitzø inflicts on him

• Would only need one direct hit to win

• Ryan Reynolds

• The Deadpool Trilogy is a lot of fun…

TIES

• Both have some similar weapons

• Both have weapons that exceed each others durability

• Can BFR each other

• Similar IQ and BIQ

DISADVANTAGES

• …would be slower with every other end

• Would take unnecessary damage

• Hello Kitty Duffle Bag isn’t as easy to transport

• Could still get harmed by bullets

• …but his Regeneration does have it’s limits

• And if you wanted to give Blitzø his Angelic Rifle, Blitzø could just turn off the Regeneration

• …but is less effective with using them

• …that would require prep time

• TJ Miller was in the first two movies

• …X-Men Origins on the other hand

• Just realized with the stats and wincons given to Blitzø, comic Deadpool might lose

And there you go, both Blitzø and Deadpool were extremely impressive and capable fighters and as you’ve seen they had several advantages over each other.

Ultimately though, this should be a solid Deadpool win. It’s not a stomp, far from it actually, but Deadpool had the better win-cons.

While Blitzø was faster and could likely get past the physical barrier with his weaponry, the Regeneration and Pain Tolerance would be difficult to overcome. Now it is far from impossible for him to get past it as there are several ways he could’ve won. He could’ve blown Deadpool’s brains out, severed all his limbs off, cut off his head, blown him to bits with some of his more explosive firepower, or make Deadpool faint due to a loss of blood. But those are the only real wincons Blitzø has going for him, meanwhile Deadpool’s are far simpler.

Not only would Blitzø have to get past Deadpool’s Healing Factor, but he would also have to avoid getting hit once as even a single hit could likely take him out. The gap between them in Strength and Durability is pretty massive which would make the likelihood of Deadpool hitting Blitzø once and winning far greater than Blitzø  achieving specific wincons.

In fairness, Blitzø’s superior speed and range could make it difficult for Deadpool to get his hands on Blitzø for a time, but the moment Deadpool does it is over. Not to mention the speed gap wasn’t massive enough that Deadpool would never hit Blitzø or anything like that. Deadpool also could likely just dodge most of what Blitzø throws at him since he is a casual bullet timer. Also Blitzø wouldn’t expect Deadpool’s Regeneration so when it finally does hit him it will certainly throw him off.

Now if you gave Blitzø his Angelic Rifle it would be closer, but it wouldn’t change things too drastically. Not only could Deadpool likely avoid the shots, but the chances of Blitzø landing a truly lethal blow with this that Deadpool couldn’t endure is low.

Blitzø put up a HELLUVA fight, but Deadpool simply OutFOXED him!

Who Would Win? Marvel Jesus himself, Deadpool!

NEXT TIME!

HELLO HELLO!

Oh god dammit! You were the one making Chimichangas?

Really? That’s what you question and not the Francis thing? But yes I suppose.

Ok what are you doing here?

What, you think I’m letting a blue rodent break the 4th wall for me? I’m here to announce the Next Time!

What the, I WANT TO DO THAT!

Too bad I…

What?

…

Why are you looking at me like that?

Really?

What?

This is your next time? How brainrotted are you?

Oh shut up.

Fine, I know when I’m not wanted.

…

NEXT TIME IS SUBWAY SURFERS JAKE VS TEMPLE RUN GUY!

GET OUT!

…

I need to get a lock for my door…